Boss in Germany and Colleagues in France? Building Trust from a Distance

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As the new season of Emily in Paris unfolds on Netflix, we see Emily continuing to build trust and relationships on the ground in France—a strategy that has clearly set her apart from Madeline, her U.S.-based manager, who struggles to connect across cultures, whether remotely or in person. Having worked with a manager in Ireland, corporate headquarters in California, and colleagues in France, Spain, India, China, and… well, all over the world, I can’t help but see the parallels between Emily in Paris and the reality each of us faces in global organizations.

But unlike Emily, we can’t be everywhere in person. So, how do we build strong, trusting relationships when we’re not physically present?

Building trust isn’t easy. It evolves over time through consistent communication and collaboration, allowing colleagues to get to know each other and ultimately fostering strong, stable relationships. The disruptions of recent years have permanently transformed our traditional methods of relationship-building. The days of meeting face-to-face and taking the time to understand each other’s character, values, and personal qualities in real-time are largely behind us.

This challenge is especially pronounced for those managing teams, clients, or investors abroad. In the past, hopping on a plane to meet in person was a routine part of business. Today, we’re often just another voice on a conference call or the teammate appearing on a screen while others gather around a table. This is the reality that continues to shape our interactions as we navigate the digital world and its physical constraints.

In today’s global workplace, we face new questions: When does physical travel still hold value? Are there alternative ways to bridge physical distance, foster deep relationships, and sustain our impact and success?

How Do You Build Trust From a Distance?

Be Professional

It all begins with convincing the other party that you have the ability and expertise to get things done. Being perceived as highly professional allows people to trust you and your word, even from a distance. It’s crucial to understand that simply stating you can do something isn’t enough—you need to prove it. Come prepared for meetings, understand both the details and the big picture, be ready to answer questions, and demonstrate your engagement. This means only promising what you can deliver and not hesitating to explain what can’t be done or why you might disagree. Trust is most compromised by surprises—like failing to keep promises, missing deadlines, being unavailable, or mismatched expectations.

Physical distance complicates the flow of information; it becomes harder to stay on top of all the details in real-time. That’s why it’s vital to ask questions and seek clarity. Ensure you fully understand how success is defined and by whom. Then, stay aligned with your stakeholders to prevent any gaps in expectations.

Communicate and Be Transparent

Frequent and clear communication is key to minimizing misunderstandings. When you know someone will inform you if something goes awry, you don’t feel the need to constantly request updates. However, if you’ve experienced surprises from an employee or business partner before, the urge to micromanage kicks in. This lack of trust can deteriorate the entire relationship. Being consistently trustworthy is always the best strategy.

The challenge arises when, despite our best intentions, life throws curveballs. Timelines shift, priorities change, and sometimes we’re not on the same page as the other party. We might misunderstand their requirements or depend on others to fulfill our promises. Even organizational politics can influence how you’re perceived, regardless of your work ethic and intentions. That’s why the more transparent you are about your motivations, values, and decision-making processes, the more others will trust you and feel comfortable with your actions—even when they don’t see the whole picture.

Mind Cultural Differences

Even when we’re not consciously aware of them, there are fundamental principles of conduct that strengthen our relationships by establishing common ground. For example, when you tell your manager in Israel that “everything is under control,” there’s a shared understanding of what that means and what to expect. However, this mutual understanding can be lost when you and your boss come from different cultures. In Israel, committing to a timeline might imply a degree of flexibility—perhaps a week’s leeway. But if your counterpart is in Germany or the USA, they likely expect your deliverables precisely on the agreed-upon date, either early in the morning or by the close of business.

Cultural differences can sometimes erode trust. The situation can worsen if your manager lacks cultural awareness, interpreting the misunderstanding as disrespect or poor performance. In such cases, it might be helpful to involve a “cultural interpreter” to bridge the gap and provide context. And remember: an open conversation can go a long way in resolving these issues.

Be Generous

Given the distance, it’s crucial to give more than you receive to build trust and strong connections. Understand that there are likely things you don’t know you don’t know, as well as potential misunderstandings on both sides. This makes it essential to increase the flow of information—not just to perform your job effectively, but also for your career growth.

At first glance, this might seem daunting. People often hoard information and credit, but what you really need to do is the opposite: share, share, share! Start by mapping your network and identifying people who share your values and interests at work. Then, stay connected and share everything you know that might be helpful to them. You’ll be surprised how much valuable information they’ll share in return—information you might not have access to otherwise. This also includes sharing credit. Recognize everyone involved in or impacted by your work, engage them, gather their feedback, keep them updated, and include them as co-creators, teammates, or contributors. You’ll find that your future tasks become much easier and faster to accomplish.

Generosity also shines through in your behavior. Avoid rolling your eyes in meetings when you disagree with someone, and steer clear of gossip. If someone is struggling, offer help or simply listen. Ultimately, people remember how you made them feel—you want that memory to be a positive one.

Authenticity Begets Trust

Everyone struggles sometimes, and things can go off course. If you’re always saying “great” when someone asks how you are, you’re missing an opportunity to build trust. Be open about your challenges and hardships, just as much as you share your wins and successes. Ask for help and seek others’ opinions. This humanizes you and helps others connect with you on a personal level, not just a professional one. Don’t be afraid—vulnerability and empathy are integral to today’s workplace. You don’t have to have all the answers. Often, it’s more effective to bring the right people together to find a solution than to try being the smartest person in the room. Additionally, when you’re working remotely, this approach ensures you have allies who will support you, especially in situations where you’re not physically present to advocate for yourself.

This strategy extends beyond just work tasks—you’re building relationships. You don’t always need to jump straight into work talk at the beginning of a meeting. Think about how you’d interact if you were meeting your partners in their office overseas. You’d likely have a casual chat about a world event or a favorite sport over lunch. Try to maintain this dynamic even when working remotely: take a few moments to discuss non-work topics—something both sides are comfortable with. It could be hobbies or international current affairs, just like you would with local colleagues or at a conference coffee break. Pay attention to cues: if someone shares something personal at the start of the meeting, it’s a good signal that it’s okay to do the same.

When your remote colleagues feel they understand who you are, trust you, and know what to expect from you, distance becomes irrelevant. Communication flows, relationships thrive, and you have everything you need to bridge the miles—just like that old friend you haven’t seen in years, but when you do, you pick up right where you left off without missing a beat. This approach isn’t limited to international relationships. Even when working remotely within the same country, these principles are crucial for building trust and maintaining strong connections. The tools and strategies used to bridge global distances are equally effective for fostering collaboration and understanding in any remote work environment, ensuring that your team stays cohesive and aligned, no matter where they are.

Nirit Cohen

Nirit Cohen is an expert in the future of work, bridging the gap between emerging trends and practical solutions, providing valuable insights for careers, management, organizations, and broader societal systems.

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